I haven’t shared my testimony in a very long time. So I thought, what better way than on here!! What a great idea!! And since this is my blog and I can do whatever I want, I am going to give you the extended version! So enjoy…
I grew up in church. You could probably say that I started going while in the womb. 🙂 Every Sunday, Wednesday, and whatever special occasion or event there was, I was at there. That is all I have ever known and I am so grateful for that. So, yes, I grew up knowing all about Jesus. I heard Beth Moore say this in a video I was watching the other day, “I have always had a heart for Jesus.” Meaning, she had not always known Him personally, but she was always drawn to Him. That is totally me! Lord no, I am NOT comparing myself to Beth Moore!! Not even close!! However, in that aspect, we are similar. I did not surrender my life to Jesus until I was a teenager, but I have always loved Him. I went to every Vacation Bible School (VBS) when I was younger, and was at every youth event when I got older. And even now, I am completely involved as much as possible. Not because I feel like I have to, but because I enjoy it and I want to! My church home is like my family and I need them in my life! As a Christian, it’s important to have that kind of family in your life.
So I accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was 18. I was at college. I didn’t realize it then, but I was so blessed to go to the college I went to. I got a scholarship to play basketball at small Baptist college in MS called, Blue Mountain College. Not to be confused with Blue Mountain State!! I have had people ask me that lately and they are so NOT the same!!! If you have no clue what I am talking about, then disregard. Anyway, this school couldn’t have been more perfect for me. It was very small, although it has grown a lot since, it was smaller than my high school when I was there. So everyone knew everyone. It wasn’t uncommon to see the president of the college walking down the hall on your way to class. Crazy, right?! I loved it! It was a private school at the time, and it was predominately women. The only men that went there were ones going into the ministry. We only had two sports. Basketball and tennis. And it was only women that played. It has since become a public school and they have many sports for men and women. Being that so small would drive a lot of people crazy, and don’t get me wrong, it was something to get used to. The thing that was so cool though was that everyone on campus LOVED their BMC basketball. We were the main event whenever we had a game, and it was AWESOME!
Since it was a private Baptist college, we always had events and Christian speakers coming in on the weekend. Or the Baptist Student Union (BSU) would have little weekend retreats for us with a speaker. Ugh, I miss it just thinking about it! This particular week, I remember driving in my car and Satan was doing a number on me. He was making me doubt my salvation. To the point, I battling thoughts and it got to the point that I did not no where I was going to spend eternity. Now, at this point in my life, I had, in Christian lingo, “walked the aisle” a couple of times and been baptized twice. Meaning, I went through the motions of becoming a Christian, but I never fully surrendered my life to Jesus. Most people would wonder why I didn’t just stop right there in my car and pray to ask Jesus into my life. Well, I’m somewhat stubborn, and I just kept fighting with those thoughts. Of course you are saved Magan, you’ve been baptized twice, which FYI, does NOT save you. But I was so good at playing the part of church, how could I not be saved by now?! So, that brings us to the weekend retreat with the speaker, Wade Morris. This was the weekend after all those thoughts went on in the car. I honestly couldn’t tell you what he talked about. I remember him mentioning his bulldog at one time, but I don’t know the significance behind that story. All I remember is at the time of the invitation, I knew that I was tired of playing games and it was time to actually surrender my life to Jesus! I needed to give every part of my life to Him! I remember my friend that I played ball with and I both accepted Jesus that night. And another cool thing was that one of our other teammates was the one that prayed with us to accept Jesus!! How cool is that?!
My life changed at that point. And when I say change, I mean in the spiritual sense. Like I said before, I had always loved the Lord, and I was never that girl that went through a wild stage. Trust me, I definitely had my problems. I was not perfect by any means, but the difference was that my relationship with Jesus became real that day! I wasn’t just playing the part anymore. It became a PERSONAL relationship and not one that was just on the surface. And it was something that I chose. That is what I love about Jesus! We get to choose. Like a bride says yes to her groom, I am forever a bride to the King of the world!!! When I came home and told my pastor, at the time, he said something to me that I will never forget. He said, “never let the devil tell you different.” Come on Jesus!! I mean really! I swear that was Jesus speaking through him! And since that day, I have never let doubt or Satan get in my head when it comes to my relationship with my Lord. I am covered by the blood of Jesus and I am His FOREVER!!!!
It has been no cake walk since that time. I have gone through a lot of ups and downs, and I have been tested a lot as well. I have failed miserably at some of those tests. But one of the things (although, there are many) about God that sets Him apart from every other god or stinkin “made up” religion, is JESUS! God in the flesh! He sent his son, Jesus, to die on a cross for you and me and He ROSE from the grave on the third day!! HALLELUJAH!!He CHOSE to be beaten, He CHOSE to carry the cross, and He CHOSE to die all because of love! And that cross represents forgiveness for EVERY sin that you ever commit. AKA…GRACE!!! We don’t deserve it, but He gives it. Thank you Lord! Wow! He loved us that much. I remember when my brother and sister-in-law had their first son. My oldest nephew, Eli. Of course they were so excited because he was their first child. But Dusty looked at Erin as they were holding him, and said something like, “Can you imagine giving him up to die for anyone?” Whew! Lord, I have tears just thinking about it. I haven’t had a child yet, so I don’t know from personal experience, but Dusty and Erin were so overwhelmed with the love of their first born son that they actually got a tiny glimpse of the love that God has for His SON. And God gave His Son to die for US!
If you have never said “Jesus, please come into my life. Save my soul!” or something of that nature, please don’t wait any longer! He longs to be the God of your life. He loves you so much more than you could ever imagine! And you are missing out on one truly incredible relationship! It’s SO good! No, it’s not easy. It’s actually pretty hard sometimes, but you are NEVER alone! He is ALWAYS there. He will be the most consistent thing in your life! If you want Jesus in your life, all you have to do is ask!! It’s that easy. And if you need help doing that, PLEASE message me!!! I will gladly pray with you!! You will never regret this decision!! I promise! And from that point on you will be His, your life will be changed, and you will be with Him for eternity. I will be there too!!! 🙂
God, I pray for any and every heart that you are speaking to right now after reading this post!! God, I pray they hear Your voice, and I pray they LISTEN to Your voice! Please do not let them be afraid. Lord, give them the strength to send me a message or to talk to someone else about this. Thank you Lord for the cross and the meaning behind it. Thank you for Jesus! I love you with all of my heart Lord!! All these things, I pray in the name of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ…AMEN!!!!